Much to my shock the voice belonged to the BYU library hall monitor guy and he was pointing at me! I realized that he thought my half eaten doughnut was a gun!
I very slowly started to back up, not making any sudden movements lest he beat me with...okay I am not really sure if those guys have anything with which they could beat a person, but I wasn't taking any chances. I decided to take a slow bite to let him know that I had a pastry in my hand and not a dangerous weapon. "Sir," he said with a voice less likely to engage panic circuits in citizenry across three continents, "you can't have food in the library."
That was it!?! Fifteen years frightened off my life for that!? The crowd, obviously relieved that nuclear holocaust was apparently not imminent moved back to life while I shakily took the last bite of my dounut. At the time I was shocked at the trouble the poor kid took over two bites of pastry; however, I soon realized that he was really...
CONAN THE LIBRARIAN disguised as a puny BYU hall montior lest the students be frightened away.
From now on we're making sure not to return any books late because one never knows what might happen.