Saturday's Child Works Hard for its Living

Charlotte Denise Gravett was born on Saturday, October 4th.  Here is her birth story.

Starting around the middle of September my doctor noticed that my uterus was measuring smaller than it should be.  It had stayed the same size for 3 weeks in a row and it made my doctor concerned that Charly wasn't growing properly.  He had me hook up to a fetal monitor and lay down for 20 minutes to see how she was doing.  She was doing great, with good heart acceleration during contractions.  And he was pleased that I was having contractions!  We decided to just have a couple of appointments to monitor Charly during the week and see how she was doing at the next appointment.  She always did great during these monitoring sessions, moving plenty of times and getting her heart rate up when I had contractions.

Dr. Ofori was still concerned that she wasn't growing, though, because the measurement wasn't increasing.  He said that he didn't think he would let me go past 39 weeks because there was no point keeping her in past that if she wasn't getting the benefit of added growth.  She would grow after she was born and started nursing, and her lungs and organs would be developed enough.  So we started to expect that I would be induced by the end of September.  To complicate matters, my doctor went on vacation for the last week of September, so I had to do one fetal monitoring session with a doctor in St. George, and if I had gone into labor before then I would have had to deliver in St. George.  But I didn't go into labor, Dr. Ofori came back, and--surprise!!--Dr. Ofori was so pleased with how well she was doing (and that she had grown a little bit), that he decided not to induce me after all.

By this time, I was so ready to be done being pregnant that I was not at all pleased with this news.  I'd told my mom about his plans to induce me, so on October 1st she drove to Mesquite, leaving home before my appointment.  When I called her with the news, she decided to just come anyway and see if she could help me go into labor.  I'd been having some pretty strong regular contractions during the night for several nights, all of them coming around 3 or 3:30, so she was pretty sure that I would go into labor soon.

As a funny side note, the first time I woke up with these contractions, I was so sure that I was going into labor, and that I would have the baby that day.  I had read several birth stories that talked about going into labor at night, and they all mentioned staying in bed for as long as possible and getting all the rest you could.  So I stayed in bed, but I started timing contractions.  They stayed strong for a long time, but they were very sporadic, not predictable at all.  Every night, they would eventually stop.  So disappointing!

We did a lot of walking (although I'd already been walking a lot with Lizzy Jo before her arrival), and I did some squats at the park while Mom played with Lizzy Jo.  But mostly we had fun, talked, and my mom let me rest while she took care of Lizzy.  I knew from my labor with Lizzy Jo that I wanted to be well rested going into labor.

On Saturday morning I woke up at 3:50 with contractions again.  Again, I tried to rest through them, not even bothering to time them at first because I'd been disappointed so many times.  Finally around 5:00 I started timing them, and they were getting pretty regular.  Dave was sleeping on the couch (he frequently does that because he wakes up in the night and will get back to sleep better if he changes locations), so without worrying about waking him, I got up and started moving around in the bedroom getting things together and just seeing if the movement would make the contractions stop.  The contractions felt less painful when I wasn't lying down, but they stayed pretty regular.  I became pretty sure that this was the real deal.  I tried sleeping again for a while, but they were strong enough that I couldn't sleep.  I just laid there and rested.

Around 7, I got up and went out to the couch to let Dave know what was going on.  He asked me what I wanted to do.  I decided that I wanted to go for a walk to see if more exertion would stop the contractions.  I knew that if they didn't stop, walking would help move Charly down and I was okay with that.  We peeked into my mom's room and let her know we were leaving and to listen for when Lizzy Jo woke up.  We started walking our usual route around the neighborhood, but decided to leave off one of the loops in case we wanted to get home faster than usual.  It was a good thing too, because the walking intensified my contractions.  We'd walked about 10 minutes when I had a contraction that I had to lean on Dave to get through.  At that point we decided to head home and stay a little closer.

We ate breakfast, got Lizzy Jo up, and I sat on a birthing ball to help the contractions move Charly down.  My mom wanted to make a Christmas stocking for her while she was here, so she helped me look through her Christmas fabric and choose what I liked.  Lizzy wanted me to hold her a little while, and I did hold her through a few contractions, but I was starting to get more uncomfortable and decided that I wanted to get into the tub.

We had a walk-in tub in our guest bathroom (we've since removed it to replace it with a regular tub) that I used for laboring.  It was so nice to kneel in the tub and lean on the seat, letting the warm water soothe my belly while squatting and still remaining mostly vertical.  I used a tub at the hospital to labor in with Lizzy Jo, but I didn't really know how to use it that well.  I stayed in a mostly reclined position, and while it was soothing, I think that my labor may have been shorter if I'd walked around instead of using it.

I was in the tub for at least 1.5 hours.  Lizzy Jo came in to say hi to me once, but mostly I was alone during this time.  Dave was playing with Lizzy to keep her from bothering me and to keep her from really noticing or becoming anxious about my labor.  My mom worked on the Christmas stocking!  And I listened to my Hypnobirthing CDs and relaxed.  I can't remember now why I decided to get out of the tub.  I think that my mom had come in to check on me and just saw how things were progressing, and suggested that I might find it easier to go to the hospital now and labor more there, rather than laboring at home and then having to face the more difficult labor while in the car.

I got out of the tub, and couldn't get myself dressed!  I would just be getting ready to get clothes on when I'd have a contraction and have to sit down through it.  My mom came back to check on me, and she had to help me dress.  I thought she would have told Dave what was going on, but he later told me that he was surprised to find me getting ready to go to the hospital and my mom dressing me!

We got into the car, drove ALL the way to the hospital (Haha!  It's less than 5 minutes away from our house.), and realized that I'd forgotten my purse, which had my ID in it.  We drove home again, got it, and drove back to the hospital.  I'd told Dave on our way there the first time that I would just walk into the hospital.  But when we got there the second time, he said he'd go get a wheelchair, and I didn't fight him on it.  I was definitely feeling the pain.

Because it was Saturday, we checked in through the emergency room entrance, then Dave wheeled me up to the 2nd floor to the maternity wing.  The nurses were great getting me comfortable and settled in.  They said to just do whatever we wanted, and they meant it!  I was laboring at the hospital from around 11:30 to 3:30, and they only came in to check on me a couple of times.  They never did any fetal monitoring, and only checked my progress once or twice.

Dr. Ofori came in to see how things were going, and just said, "Okay, you're doing great.  I think we're going to see the baby soon."  Because I'd labored for 12 hours at the hospital with Lizzy Jo (because we went so soon after labor started), I didn't think he could be right.  But when he checked me a little while later, he said that I was nearly complete, and asked if I would like him to break my water so that I could dilate that last bit.  I said yes, and it was awful to lie down for him to do it (I'd labored the entire time sitting on the edge of the bed), but it wasn't too much longer before my contractions started to change.  Really, I didn't feel like my contractions changed, but I felt like I was reacting to them differently.  I was having a harder time remaining calm through them, and my groans through contractions were more like unsteady wails.  The nurse came in and said, "She sounds pushy!"  She asked me if I felt like I had to push, but I really didn't.  Soon after that, the doctor asked if I'd gone to the bathroom since I'd arrived at the hospital, and when I said no he said that my bladder was acting as a cushion that was keeping her head from descending the last bit.  I got up and peed, and then the rubber really hit the road!  I was in pain, and I felt like it really couldn't be as close as they kept saying.  I still didn't feel the need to push, but they asked me to push during the next contraction while Dr Ofori held back a lip of cervix that was still in the way.  I pushed through the next contraction, and Charly was born!

She weighed 6 lbs 8 oz (3 oz more than Lizzy Jo had weighed), and was 20 inches (same height), so I've often wondered about the fuss over her not growing!  Yes, I make small babies, but she was slightly bigger than Lizzy.

One more thing to note: When Lizzy Jo came into my recovery room to see her sister for the first time, she squealed, "Hold it!!"  She has never lost her enthusiasm for her sister.  During the first few months she did try to push her off my lap a couple of times, and she bit her arm once for no reason that she was able to explain to me.  But other than those instances, she has appeared totally devoted to her sister, at times calling her "My Dear", "My Baby", and talking to her in baby talk and a loving voice.  She loves to get right up into her face to say hi and give her hugs, which Charly has recently started to complain about.  She's getting strong enough to push her sister away sometimes!  Some pictures of the girls tomorrow.

Hello Grandma and Grammy!!

Lizzy Jo wants to write a note to her Grammy and Grandma, who read this blog.  Here is what she says:

I love you!  Hi, Grammy!  Hi Grandma!  I love you!  I miss you!

2014

Dave wrote a big update for us more than 6 months ago, but we never published it.  And even though it is a 6-month-old update and I wanted to write a more current one, I thought it would be best to just publish it.  Then if I got around to a recent update, there would be TWO new blog posts.  Wow!

2014 was a big year for us.

In January, we found out I was pregnant!

In February, I decided to kick my butt into gear and finish my thesis!

In March and April, I went to Arizona twice for a couple weeks at a time so my mom could help me take care of Lizzy Jo while I wrote my thesis.

In May, we found out we were going to have another girl!  We also put in an offer for a house in Mesquite, and it was accepted!

In June, I defended my thesis, revised it some more (I think I revised that thing about 100 times!), and finally submitted it.  We also closed on our new house, painted, moved into it, and cleaned up the old apartment, all while all of us were sick.  This was only possible with the help of some really good friends, family, and ward members.

In July, we got settled into the new house and use the pool a lot.

In August, I graduated!  Also, we traveled to cool Flagstaff, and used the pool a lot when we were home.

In September, we prepared for the baby to come and used the pool a lot (it's hot here in Mesquite, can you tell?)

In October, Charlotte Denise Gravett was born!!  This gets its own post some day soon (But don't count on it really soon, because if you're reading this, that would be hoping for THREE new blog posts.)

In November, we had our Gravett family come visit us for Thanksgiving, our first big gathering in our new home.  It was so much fun.

In December, we went to St. George to spend Christmas with our Packard family.  We all stayed in some condos there, with almost every member of the family in attendance.  We were only missing my neice and great niece, my nephew, and my brother Matt.  Such fun!

We're Having a Baby!

Hi everybody out there in the interwebs. It is so good to see (metaphorically at least) you's guys again. As our most faithful readers know, we have not posted in approximately several months. You may think that this was because either 1) nothing interesting has happened in our lives or 2) we're simply too lazy to post on our blog and update our friends. If you thought either of those things you are completely wrong. In fact, it turns out that the name "lifebymerryanddave" is a registered trademark of a multinational conglomerate headquartered in Djibouti but with significant business operations in the United States. Our blog was shut down pursuant to court order while we duked it out with the company over its name. However, that issue is now cleared up and I'm sure you will see regular posts on the issues that matter most to us.

So, what's been going on? We're pregnant!!! That's right, we're participating in an experimental procedure whereby each parent carries half of the fetus and then they get glued together at delivery. Okay, actually Merry's the pregnant one, but she assures me I had something to do with it at some point. We're having a girl on or about October 7, 2014. I've asked Merry to hold off until October 31 so we could have two holiday babies (Lizzy Jo was born on New Year's Day); she says she'll try her hardest.

Lizzy Jo is doing her very best to grow up into a little girl. We've done our best to stop this perplexing development but it seems like every day she has learned some new word or has climbed into some new place she's not supposed to be. Next thing we know she'll have run off with some boy who ride a big wheel and is already wearing pull-ups. Lizzy Jo also absolutely loves the new house; her favorite thing to do is to run down the hallway stomping her feet on the tile.

Oh yes, we're moving. Ten minutes down the road to a house here in Mesquite. This means we're probably gonna be here for a while. In fact, if we stay here until we retire, we won't have to move to a retirement community because we'll already be there. Merry would like to get back into teaching now that she's got her Master's Degree; she's hoping to find a spot either here at the local community college, up at Dixie State, or at UNLV. We'll keep you posted.

That's right y'all. Merry finally completed her thesis and will be graduating in August.  Woot! Woot! It was a lot of hard work (and just a little bit of procrastination) but she got it done and we're all super proud of her.

Anyway, that's all the news here in Mesquite, where all the women are old, the men are...old as well, and the children are all non-existent.

Neighborly Consideration

We live at the very back of our condo complex.  And because they are condos, most of the units are either unoccupied several months of the year (because the owners are snow birds), or are occupied by the aged owners.  This combination means that it's a very quiet place to live.

However, there are rental units (obviously, since we live in one), and they don't always attract the highest quality of tenants.  There have been rumors of tenants in other buildings running drug houses and things like that.  But I've always felt like our complex was a safe place.  Apparently others do not, as the following story demonstrates.

In mid-October Dave, Lizzy Jo, and I made a whirlwind trip to Arizona to see my parents.  We left Friday at 3:30pm, and got back at 1:15am on Sunday.  We would have stayed longer, but I had to be back at church so I could conduct our church choir.  And we couldn't leave earlier because Dave had to be in court to represent a client on Friday.

Needless to say, all of us were tired and the car was a mess!  10 hours of driving in less than 34 hours is a lot. I decided to go out early Sunday morning to pick up all the water bottles, trash, and various items that were strewn about the front and back seats.  There were also some baby clothes, the hiking backpack, and our ipod.  I decided to shove everything into the hiking backpack since that would make it easier to bring everything in in one trip.

As I made my way from the driver's side to the passengers side to start picking up stuff over there, I noticed a lady walking her dog.  Every retired person in Mesquite owns a small lap dog!  It's like it's written into the HOA rules and regulations.  So I thought nothing of it.  But as I leaned in to grab the next bunch of trash, I heard her ask me, "Can I help you with anything?"

Me: "Oh no that's fine.  I've got it."  I expected her to keep walking her dog, but she just stood there, so I went on: "I'm just cleaning out the car after a quick trip this weekend."  Still no movement.  "We left Friday after my husband was done in court, and got back late last night, so the car is really a mess."

Her: "Does your husband go to court often?"

Me: "Yes, he does! Do you know him?"  I thought that she knew Dave through work and was just figuring out that I was his wife.

Her: "Oh.  No."  She turned away, and I think she started to reach for her cell phone in her pocket.

Me: "I mean, yes he's an attorney.  He goes to court a lot because he's an attorney."  I had just put all the pieces together.

Her: "Oh!  Well, I just thought I'd ask.  There are criminals all around us here!"

She thought that I was breaking into the car and stealing stuff, so she approached me. Then she thought I was admitting to my husband being a criminal! I'm willing to bet that she would have called the police if I hadn't set the record straight!